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Chicago, IL
Posts: 9501
Joined: Dec, 2003
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[#1] Posted: 07/02/2012 - 4:13:14 PM |  |  |
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This cracked me up........
A question mark walks into a bar?
Two quotation marks ?walk into? a bar.
The bar was walked into by the passive voice.
Three intransitive verbs walk into a bar. They sit. They drink. They leave.
What would have happened had a subjunctive walked into a bar?
An antecedent walked into a bar, and they ordered a drink.
An ellipsis walked into a bar?...
Bartender asks a woman what she wants. ?An entendre,? she says. ?Make it a double.? So he gives it to her.
A comma splice walks into a bar, it has a drink and then leaves.
A dangling modifier walks into a bar. After finishing a drink, the bartender asks it to leave.
An alliteration traipsed into a tavern, where it tangled tempestuously with an insistent, illiterate intern.
A typo wakled into a bar.
A rabbi, a priest, and a clich? walk into a bar.
Two possessive apostrophe's walk into the bar as if they owned the place.
A subject and a verb have a disagreement in a bar, and one of them pull out a pistol.
A heedless homonym walks into a bar. You think he wood of scene it write in front of him.
The Oxford Comma joined in a high-spirited debate at the bar that included his parents, Ayn Rand and the Bishop of Canterbury.
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Kurt in Chicago
"If I smell it, it goes in the report".............Phillip Smith...2012
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Crystal Lake, IL
Posts: 1174
Joined: Sep, 2003
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Grammar Jokes
[#2] Posted: 07/02/2012 - 4:32:08 PM | | |
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Three guys walking down a street. Two walked into a bar. The third guy ducked.
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Reisterstown, Maryland
Posts: 265
Joined: Apr, 2011
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Grammar Jokes
[#3] Posted: 07/02/2012 - 6:46:06 PM | | |
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Some are well spoken, others just well punctuated.
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Bob Kenney
www.IndependentHomeInspectionMD.com
"We are masters of the unspoken word, and slaves to those we speak." Winston Churchill |
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Gaston, Oregon
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Chicago, IL
Posts: 9501
Joined: Dec, 2003
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Grammar Jokes
[#5] Posted: 07/03/2012 - 05:49:57 AM | | |
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Actually, it can be either. There are strong arguments for and against. Depends on which rules you want to abide by.
The omission made the point.
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Kurt in Chicago
"If I smell it, it goes in the report".............Phillip Smith...2012
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