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Bidet Toilet Seat

Mike Lamb

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Many years ago, I was at a party with a woman who had never used a bidet before. She excused herself to go to the bathroom, and came out a few minutes later only to say that it was time for us to leave. I asked why, and she looked down at her skirt. I looked down, too, and saw that the skirt was soaked.

Before I could say a word, she said in a low voice, "The f**king bidet . . . If you make a joke, or even smile, I will never speak to you again."

Apparently, there's a learning curve associated with adjusting the spray pressure.

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