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Translation needed


Les
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Will someone translate this letter for me.

Thank You.

TEXT IN RED IS MINE

November 30, 2009

Mrs. XXXXXX XXXXXXX

This follow-up letter for inspection report # (XXXXXX), your limited visual residential home inspection of the property at XXXX XXXXX. Lansing, MI. is to emphasize and reiterate the findings and critical conditions found with the attic and roof. WOW!

The two large bird’s nests in the home’s attic must be dealt with extreme caution and as an environmental hazard material, to be removed by qualified professionals. WHY? ARE THEY EAGLES? Condors? The exterior inspection of the roof did not indicate recent repairs, yet the presents (left over from Santa?) of multiple points of water intrusion, and wood damage in the attic, were captured in the pictures taken in the attic. Recent repairs to ceilings in multiple rooms in the home support the extent of roof problems from repeated moisture intrusion events. I sure hope they do not escape, now that we have captured them!We can not verify the extent of structural damage to roof sheathing, as well as wall, ceiling and roof support structural members without a more through and professional re evaluation. So? Who should I call to supplement this limited visual home inspection?

Action taken by past owners to seal leaks at the chimney, see pictures, indicate unprofessional improper repairs which again may have led to other critical structural support problems.

Thank you again for selecting us for your home inspection needs.

Please call, my cell phone, (XXX) XXX-XXXX, if you have any questions or if we can be of further service.

Sincerely,

XXXXXXXX

Managing Officer

The original inspection report was three pages long. Actually was even worse* than this supplement. $400.00 well spent.*per tom raymond!!

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I thought it was very well written except for the use of 'worst' when you clearly meant 'worse'.

Oh, was I supposed to comment on the black text? Delete everything between the salutation and the signature, although what's left still needs some editting. Someone should tell this guy that most word processing software has templates for business letters built in. I am particularly amused by the 'Managing Officer' title, I don't think this dope is qualified to manage a McDonalds.

Tom

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Erby,

Yep, we know about bird nests. We do lots of that sort of work thru our pest company.

Jim,

This was a repo house with a pretty good offer until the inspector wrote his inspection report and that report was given to the owner (bank). The potential buyer wanted everything on the report corrected by the owner. The report could not be understood, so the owner ask me to review it on their behalf along with recommendations regarding the bird nest problem and structural integrity. The sum mass of the bird nests was abt 2/3rd of a cubic foot and a cost to remove of about $100+-.

Executive Summary: Idiot inspector acting like a cowboy hero with a 3rd grade skill level. Idiot buyer thinking they can buy a 200,000 house for 60,000 and have everything perfect. Add in an agent that does not care and that is a receipe for the re-birth of the housing boom in Michigan.

In another thread, Marc is trying to develope a conversation about profession levels. This inspector fool is a Certified Master Inspector.

I have been doing this toooooooo long to suffer even more fools. I am not perfect. Nor is my company. But we try and are not ever heros.

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Near as I can tell, there's a birds nest, there's roof leaks, there's water stains everywhere, and the author doesn't seem to know what to do about any of it.

What I want to know is how the presents got captured in pictures taken in the attic.....(?)......what happens if the presents escape?

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Google "histoplasmosis" for more detail. Commonly found in bird nests.
Yeah, I've heard that before. I guess when I was a teenager, mucking out my pigeon coop every week with over 250 pigeons living in it, and not wearing a mask of any sort, that histoplasmosis didn't exist yet.

OT - OF!!!

M.

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Last year I happened to be diagnosed with Histoplasmosis. The Dr. said it was from exposure to bird droppings. Perhaps this health hazard is what the inspector was thinking, but was unable to properly communicate in his letter. I have since started wearing a half-mask respirator on ALL attic inspections, as I frequently see bird's nests during attic inspections in my neck of the woods. BTW, 30 days of a strong anti-fungal oral medication and I am Histoplasmosis free. I am hoping the urge to fly south for the winter will also soon clear up![:-crazy]

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Mike wrote that he had no ill effects from spending his teenage years wiping the rears of 250 pigeons, though folks that have met him may now come to a different conclusion. [:-monkeyd

Ezra Malernee

Canton, Ohio

LOL,

Perhaps I was affected - I don't catch the common cold....ever.

Go figger!

ONE TEAM - ONE FIGHT!!!

Mike

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